November 2010
1 post
I need a change of skin
I need this letter from Glion to get through this winter. I want to be one hundred percent sure I can leave Estonia next summer and stay away for as long as I can. it seems much less of a joke now to say that “I wouldn’t survive not getting into this university”…
why the hell am I so afraid of letting people know what I really think?
I’m so fucking ashamed of...
October 2010
4 posts
enough of this fucking emo-shit, time to be my old self again.
it’s been a while since I’ve liked a band as much as I like The Naked And Famous. they are awesome and make me feel like going out and being happy in front of some miserable people (copyright - the sleep talkin’ man). fuck, I adore their music. wish they were touring Europe, I’d so fly somewhere to see them!!!
...
infectious
well, whatever you plan on doing, do not involve me in it. I’m so fucking sick of you.
kind of embarrassing to admit, but gossip girl really is the most inspiring thing I’ve seen, read or heard in a long time.
guess it’s official
i’m superficial
this is random
truth be told (dazzled, doused in gin), i think i shouldnt ruin any lives. I don’t want anybody to feel the way I do. at least I’m happy when I’m drunk, right? seems like a good idea, sitting alone in the park and enjoying the sunshine. and champagne. tomorrow is a different story, though.
September 2010
3 posts
taste in men
I do believe that a relationship, let it be an amorous one, needs to have a beginning and an end. the sad truth is, life’s a bitch and never works the way you want to (or if it does, you’ve got to pay karma debts for your happiness afterwards) and it doesn’t matter how much of a cold hearted bitch you are or pretend to be, it gets to you. nobody likes to be left for someone else...
gossip girl
<3 the new season.
Blair Waldorf: “Once men have tasted caviar, it baffles me how they settle for catfish.”
pure genius.
Enivrez-vous de Charles Baudelaire
Il faut être toujours ivre, tout est là; c’est l’unique question. Pour ne pas sentir l’horrible fardeau du temps qui brise vos épaules et vous penche vers la terre, il faut vous enivrer sans trêve. Mais de quoi? De vin, de poésie, ou de vertu à votre guise, mais enivrez-vous! Et si quelquefois, sur les marches d’un palais, sur l’herbe verte d’un fossé, vous...
August 2010
3 posts
use somebody
every time I get close to being happy again (since leaving Switzerland), something comes and ruins it all. I hate leaving and especially I hate it when people leave. I left Estonia once myself and I know it only did me good but I still can’t stand saying goodbye to people who were (are?) a huge part of my life.
and now they’re gone.
I really feel as if I’m alone in Tallinn now,...
alors on danse
I’m kinda ashamed to quote that kind of a song but here it goes:
Et là tu t’dis que c’est fini car pire que ça ce serait la mort quand tu crois enfin que tu t’en sors quand y en a plus et ben y en a encore
‘aren’t you such a catch what a prize you’ve got a body like a battle axe’
dedicated to the gorgeous dude I saw tonight near Hell Hunt
/courtesy of OK Go, the song is called Get Over It/
July 2010
4 posts
scientist
drinking alone and it’s not even 6pm yet. help
the aftermath...
…of the trip to Bulgaria is like 3 different diseases. no STDs though, haha. it sucks so bad, I basically haven’t been out of the house for 4 days now and all human connection takes place via MSN or Facebook. Jon also visits me from time to time and we make music (loads of cool stuff comin’ up) and I eat meds and move from my desk to my bed, desk - bed, desk - bed. I don’t...
WHEN THE FUCK WILL I GET TO BE NUMBER ONE???? the best fucking thing out there.
we speak no americano
overwhelmed and underslept. I can’t quite put my finger on all those feelings just yet.
Bulgaria was paradise, it was a hundred times more than I’d expected from that trip. my personal favorite moment was dancing barefooted on the shore of the Black Sea with a drink in one hand, a cigarette in the other and friends all around. not to mention the warm water and city lights..
clubbing...
June 2010
7 posts
last niiite..
thinking back on last night it feels like I was blind or something, I remember things being done and things being said but I can’t remember who did what, who did who or who said what. it’s as if I was in some kind of darkness all the fucking time.
so I stayed in the darkness with you..
siren
I feel like shouting SO LOUD how much I thank tallinn 2011 & all the crazy ppl (joona!!) we met in Helsinki for the most awesome awesome AWESSOOOOME weekend ever! 9h of sleep in 3 nights…
i wonder how come the sleepiness kicks in only at home and not anywhere else?
RUN FAST FOR YOUR MOTHER
RUN FAST YOR YOUR FATHER
RUN FOR YOUR CHILDREN, ALL YOUR SISTERS ‘N YOUR BROTHERS
LEAVE ALL YOUR LOVE AND YOUR LONGING BEHIND
YOU CAN’T CARRY IT WITH YOU IF YOU WANT TO SURVIVE
.
whoa, I gotta feeling that florence’s “dog days are over” is the new “hometown glory” for me - walked home at 5am this morning in the rain listening to it. was a beautiful moment :)
happiness hit her like a bullet in the head
I first posted about Florence + the Machine’s “rabbit heart” 9 months ago. I can’t believe I still listen to this song daily, either the original or the almost-as-good P.E.S.T. remix! perfect synths, perfect bass, perfect everything. I don’t really like the rest of the album (“lungs”), except for “you’ve got the love” and “dog days...
we don't need no education
school’s out for summer, finally. I forsee a summer full of days of doing nothing and going out with friends and not feeling guilty about it.
wtf was i thinking when i wrote those last posts? I really should drink less.
May 2010
2 posts
wake up in the morning feelin' like..
just listened to ‘special needs’ by placebo again. fuck, this is such an amazing song… and i’m no longer ashamed that i’ve got “..a sucker’s dream..” as my msn address, hah.
i love wild weekends. i love summer. i love my friends.
i don’t like this life though..
please talk to me again. i need closure
and in the spring I shed my skin and it goes away...
how to become a better person? help needed. xx
April 2010
2 posts
adele
by the way, I listened to Adele’s “Hometown Glory” this morning for the first time this year. was goood
all the right friends in all the right places
wow, I was actually surprised to see visitor activity on this blog more dead than the Sahara… or something.
it’s a pity this country sucks the joy right outta me like East London sucks the joy right out of Kele of Bloc Party (Bloc Party - Song for Clay). I was in East London a week ago and it did quite the contrary, actually. but what I want to say is that it seems like the only...
February 2010
1 post
a dark place
no seriously, wtf, one needs to research this - WHY THE FUCK can’t you go to sleep if you’re tired and just wanking around the internet? why do you need to gather yourself for HOURS first and then take action? pointless. I’m too tired to go to sleep.
January 2010
2 posts
cuz I'm a material girl
things do make me happy. I’ll soon be the owner of:
and it makes me smile every time I think about it!
god put a smile upon your face
bullets are the beauty of a blistering sky bullets are the beauty and I don’t know why bullets are the beauty of a blistering sky bullets are the beauty and I don’t know why
personal responsibility personal responsibility personal responsibility personal responsibility personal virtual insanity
December 2009
1 post
November 2009
1 post
battle for the sun
with that plan out of the window, I guess I can continue writing here. not that I feel like it, but I do feel as if I can’t tell anyone about how I feel at the moment.. but then again, that’s because I’m not sure what’s wrong with me.
I want my freedom back, the freedom I had last year. I want no strings attached, I want to be able to MOVE AROUND when I want to and stay...
October 2009
1 post
************
well well well, what do you know? Music Or Die might become something bigger, much bigger than I first thought it would.. keep your eyes open and check back every once in a while. I won’t be writing much, but there could be some other exciting stuff going on. I’ll stop being cryptic whenever I get 100% sure answers ;)
September 2009
5 posts
one more thing
oh yeah, um, so Jon and me actually have a band/a project called I’ll Hit Her and it’s been what, 2 years now? and you can listen to us here. and our songs are gonna be on the radio.. wow.
RABBIT-HEARTED GIRL
geez, all the excitement!
well, yesterday Jon was all “OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG” on msn, which he does quite often, so I didn’t expect a big suprise. little did I know it were to be a great one.
so, to cut the crap short, BBC Radio 6 had called him to ask if they could play 2 of our songs on the Dave Pearce show this Sunday, between 22:00-24:00 estonian time, 20:00-22:00 UK...
oh no, what's this?
I’m feeling melancholic and nostalgic and also feeling like bursting into tears any second now. music of the day:
coldplay - warning sign arcade fire - neighborhood #1 florence and the machine - rabbit heart (raise it up) bloc party - ion square
I wish I was able to write a real post. inspiration seems to have been sent on vacation ever since school started. I’m fucking tired after 3...
funky town
I’ve been out and about a lot lately and spent a minimum amount of time at home. I did have this one home-day because everybody (including me) was too hungover and too tired to do anything. I had a Skins-marathon and ate a lot, leaving my bed only to a) switch the lights on/off b) get more food c) go to the toilet.
I’d say it’s a good series. most of the characters annoy me...
August 2009
12 posts
why do you waste my time?
..is the answer to the question on your mind
today I’m in a The Killers mood.
I’ve been trying to write a song report on Orbital’s ‘Halcyon & On & On’ but I just can’t finish it properly. maybe the emotions concerning that song are just a bit too fresh to analyze them, I don’t know. I will get to it another time.
I’m feeling inspirational,...
1 tag
no song this time
as I’ve been a bit busy trying to regain normal life after being semi-paralyzed in various beds (hostel bed in Turkey - hospital bed - my very own), I won’t write a song-report this time.
yesterday I had a nice visit from Birgit and she brought David and Naomi - 2 YFU staff people from Switzerland, the cool staff. I’m such an awful host, I knew they were coming and I promised to...
3 tags
INCUBUS - A KISS TO SEND US OFF
INCUBUS - A KISS TO SEND US OFF ever since I was what, 12, I’ve had this fix idea of going abroad - to live, to study, to work (future plans, of course.. I’m not one for child labor), to do nothing. first I teamed up with a friend. as we both had learned french in school, the obvious country of choice was France. we’d check out apartments in Paris, then decided that Paris was a...
this is the song that was supposed to be a rave...
2 tags
Suurtüki Stories
for the last 2 or 3 years, I’ve been mostly really happy. ever since I quit music school (also see this post) I haven’t stressed much. well, of course I have because this is human nature we’re talking about but looking back, every little problem seems so irrelevant. so yeah, all in all, I’ve been really happy. and I’m looking forward to this life I live (song lyrics,...
4 tags
Shiny Toy Guns - Season of Love & When Did This...
okay so these two songs are quite recent discoveries (and that’s why I’m gonna tag them that). where I got to know this band with a funky name was the (in)famous TV series Gossip Girl. I’m not gonna excuse myself by saying anything like “yeah, lame, I know, but it’s my guilty pleasure and don’t pretend like you don’t have ‘em” because...
Muse - Stockholm Syndrome
okay, so, this is the first post in this blog and I would like to make it really interesting so I’m going to choose a song I really really care about and hopefully I’ll have something smart to say about it.
most of my friends know that I adore Muse. I guess my love for them started approx 3 years ago (so I’m a Muse-n00b but I love them as much as any old fan.. I guess) and even though the first...